BECAUSE IT IS ON
Because it is stupid,
it helps my brain wind down
and finishes any chance of sleeping
or thinking.
The continuous clockwork of my mind
is finally empty,
cobwebbed perhaps but the electricity
stops and nothingness takes over.
My blood flows slower and I can
reach out and touch individual
pieces on the shish-ka-bob and eat
them at my leisure instead of deep
throating the entire skewer and
chewing it into one massive wad
that I have to force myself to swallow.
I can still feel the magnets inside
my head, polarizing themselves
and moving all the files
from one place to another.
Long-term memory becomes short
and sometime I can't remember what
I did five minutes ago,
but I can remember Coyote farting
into a shuttlecock container and then
holding it over my face until I breathed
when I was four or five years old.
On my luckiest days I can transform
myself to a realm of fantasy,
always majestic, always England,
faeries and dragons, magical
wizards, leprechauns and Druids,
childhood games of Asterix and Obelix
where I always had to play Obelix,
big and dumb, no drugs for me.
I was never allowed to play Asterix even
though I always knew I couldn't anyway,
way too much confidence, I had the
Gallic sarcasm down pat but I never
could have pulled it off.
What the fuck did they do with all those
menhirs anyway?
Dogmatix be damned, I would have had a
cat instead.
Because it is stupid,
fifteen minutes with my head at the
right angle, perfect temperature,
no sweating and I can get to sleep
otherwise its all just bullshit and
I have to put up with the lunatic
asylum that is broadcast on television
each and every night,
fearful to pinch myself lest I am
actually asleep and I don't want
to wake myself up.
Dawn breaks with a soft laugh
and a good hard kick in the teeth,
beaten down enough to begin
another lousy day.
MCC
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